Season 2016: Week 20

Another season will be in the record books this week but not before the final games are played. There is some opportunity for movement I the rankings so don’t phone this one in.

  • McLellan – McGovern: The McGovern skip has dropped off the radar so there could be some shake-up in their ranks. McLellan plans on filling a bathtub with Canadian Mist for a very special end-of-the-season Mist opportunity celebration.
  • McLaughlin – Lichty: Like Virginia Slims, Lichty has come a long way (baby), being back in the top half of the rankings has given them the confidence boost they’ve been looking for. However, this could be the night McLaughlin lights it up. Pass the Fireball.
  • Rohde – Long: Another win would help Rohde solidify their place among the top teams in the league. This week though, I see a huge disturbance in the standings. Long will kill the proverbial power and throw lights out and cruise to a huge win. #upsetoftheseason
  • Hammes – Anderson: The Beatles were bigger than Jesus and Anderson can’t curl anymore. Too bad the Broomski isn’t ready yet.
  • Boomer – Dubois: They say you have to hit rock bottom before you can claw your way back up. Boomer seems ready to pull that 180 on their season. Dubois keeps things pretty even with little definition between the highs and the lows. Complacency turns trophies into treadmills.
  • Allendorph – Lickteig: Quite possibly the battle of the season. Both rinks show only two losses each, but Allendorph has some missing data. Let’s assume this is a winner take all event. My money is on Lickteig.
  • Haga – Moll: Spring fever has hit Moll hard and keeping focused on the ice could be a problem. If Haga keeps up the NHL jersey theme, they may be able to tip the balance of power towards their favor. Just watch the high-sticking.
  • Jansen – Wainberg: Jansen’s once promising season has spiraled into a hot mess type situation. Wainberg on the other hand has been riding a keen wave of confidence and high self-esteem. This is my last chance to get a Jansen pick right. Obey dammit.

Great season, fun times everyone. Good luck to those entering the playdowns and if anyone plays a makeup game, send me the results so we can preserve them in the archives.

I hope you see most of you at the Hobber Dobber but if not, have a great summer. Maybe I’ll run into you at a party.


Season 2016: Week 18

Crap! Sorry, I didn’t post last week and now here I am again, derelict in my duties.

This week you are all winners.

Please enjoy this curling song by my favorite Canadian band that isn’t really about curling at all when you think about it.

I hope the S MPLS curling bus connects a phone through a tape adapter to listen to it over the bus speakers.

Nice work to everyone on the chili last week. Great offerings and the cleanup was grand. Let’s do it again next year.



Season 2016: Week 16

Chili night next week, see the posting above. We’re in the home stretch, final quarter of the season so it’s time to start planning your endgame.

  • Anderson – Lickteig: Meet Lickteig and friends at the Tastee Freez pregame for a milkshake and pep talk. Anderson will be across town at the Hardees getting juiced on a pile of mushroom and Swiss. The shrooms start to kick in around the 4th end and it’s all downhill from there.
  • Allendorph – Hammes: The mid game social is sponsored by Cabo Wabo Diablo and the poor decisions just keep flowing after that. Allendorph would be wise to develop an anti-hex routine if they want to hold on to this one.
  • Haga – Long: The large crowds have been fading for the once idolized Long rink. If they can get butts in the seats, they’ll have a chance this week. Haga needs to concentrate on blocking out the fans and throwing rocks like a Sasquatch.
  • Lawrence – Moll: This game will not be played. Too many gold club rewards points to burn up. You have to use them or lose them.
  • Lichty – McGovern: A battle for the ages. Blood is thicker than water and rock is harder than ice if you catch my drift. Lichty may have a chance since their shoe gloss reduction procedure, but it’s still a long shot.
  • Dveris – Dubois: The curling match gives way to a live production of Ernest Goes to Camp. You’re learning to curl the Stennis way.
  • McLellan – Boomer: I see a rare moment of clarity for Boomer this week. A new moon provides a promising sign for them while signaling darkness and fear for McLellan. Both teams can improve their odds by eating a handful of fortune cookies pregame.
  • Jansen – Rohde: If both teams can field their roster players and avoid subs this week it should be a great matchup. The environment on sheet 8 lends itself well to Jansen’s point-and-shoot-double-pull offense while Rohde knows how to use the edge of the ice to their advantage.

Again – chili.